It’s OK to not be OK

I want you to know that it’s OK to not be OK.

If you need permission to not be OK today, then OK, it’s OK to not be OK.

I’m not OK today, and I’m OK with that. Well, mostly OK.

I feel – and maybe you feel this too – that it’s kinda not OK to be not OK.

Whether I’m judging myself or I think judgement is coming from someone else, everyone else, it doesn’t matter. What matters is I don’t think it’s OK that we’ve made it not OK to be not OK.

So, I’m putting my foot down, speaking my truth, whatever you want to call it, too hell with what ‘everyone else’ thinks – I think it’s OK to not be OK.

I think it’s OK if I don’t want to try to be OK when I’m feeling not OK.

I think it’s OK if I choose to wallow for a few hours or even a whole day, and not give a damn about practising gratitude or being mindful.

I think it’s OK if I want to be angry and sad, maybe even despondent.

Or I’ll choose to sit in my it’s-not-fair space for a bit…for as long as I want!

Maybe today I don’t care about the influence my thoughts have on my reality and all that manifesting business. Maybe today I want to make it really clear to the Universe that I’m not bloody happy, and to hell with the consequences!

It’s OK to not be OK even if I do choose to do feel-good flow yoga, or to meditate.

It’s OK if I still feel angry even if I read a bunch of positive affirmations online.

It’s OK if I still feel sorry for myself even after I reflect on how there are so many who have it so much worse than me.

It’s OK if I wake my children with a cuddle and all the nurturing love I can muster up, and then go back to bed after I drop them to school.

It’s OK if I don’t care about posting on Facebook today, or how many followers I have on Instagram.

It’s OK if I write a blog post about how not OK I am.

Being not OK doesn’t mean we are weak or too sensitive.

Being not OK doesn’t make us ‘negative Nellies’.

Being not OK doesn’t mean we’re doing something wrong or there is something wrong with us.

You can be not OK.

You can be not OK and still be successful.

You can be not OK and be an amazing human being.

You can be not OK and be a great mum.

You can be not OK and be loved.

We can be not OK and hold space for ourselves.

We can be not OK and hide away from the world or reach out for support – either way is OK when you’re not OK.

We can be not OK and not bother with deep breathing excercises.

I know I am not the only person who has periods of not being OK. And I am so tired of beating myself up for not being OK. I’m tired of comparing myself to everyone else – thinking everyone else has their shit together, everyone else is just getting on with getting it done, everyone else is happy and content and enjoying life, everyone else soldiers on every single day.

Why do we make it wrong to be not OK? Why do we think we always have to build ourselves up and never break down? Is it really such a bad thing if my mindset isn’t always positive?

I’m a strong and resilient woman. I’m someone who genuinely feels a ton of gratitude for all I have, who is thankful for the wonderful life I have. I generally feel blessed and fortunate.

I’m a person who can push through, keep putting one foot in front of the other. I have achieved so much in my life that I am incredibly proud of. I set my sights on something and I work towards it.

But I have been dealt some really rough blows in my life, and I’ve been knocked down. I’ve found myself knee-deep in shit and sinking fast. No matter what the Universe has thrown at me, I’ve rallied. Dusted myself off and stood up tall and took a step forward.

I’m betting you can say pretty much the same thing. We all can, right?

Because life isn’t always rainbows and skipping through fields of wildflowers – and it isn’t supposed to be.

Life is meant to include ups and downs, highs and lows, riding high and sinking in shit.

Sometimes the hand we are dealt is a really shitty, losing hand, no matter which way we play it.

Life can punch us hard in the guts at times, and it really freaking hurts, it hurts deep.

Sometimes it can feel like the Universe has singled us out, and not in a good way.

So if things happen to us that are not OK, isn’t it OK for us to not be OK in those moments?

Why can’t it be just as acceptable for a strong and resilient, successful, positive woman to say “hey, I’m not OK today” as it is for her to say “OMG I am totally killing it at the moment, my life is awesome!”??

Why don’t we just allow ourselves to be not OK? Why can’t we say “yep, life is kicking me hard at the moment” and not have to talk ourselves out of feeling not OK? Why don’t we just accept that what we’re going through, what we’re feeling, is just as normal as kicking goals and feeling on top of the world?

Highs and lows. Light and dark. The good, the bad and the downright ugly, nasty shit. It’s all part of this crazy business we call ‘life’!

Tomorrow… In an hour… Next week… I’ll be OK again. You’ll be OK again. Because the shitshow never stays in town permanently. It’s only ever a temporary act.

Soon, flying high and winning at everything will be back in town. Flowers will smell beautiful again. The sky will be the most incredible blue. Happy, fun songs will be sung. Hearts will open wide. Food will make tastebuds dance. The hills will be alive with music. The sun’ll come up tomorrow.

Life isn’t meant to be hard, but that doesn’t mean it’s always meant to be wonderful either.

So, if life isn’t wonderful for you at the moment, if you don’t feel wonderful at the moment, I’m telling you it’s OK to be not be OK.

OK?